A guide for you for st patrick's day - Fiberglass RV


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
Old 03-17-2011, 02:43 PM   #1
Senior Member
 
Bruce H's Avatar
 
Name: Bruce
Trailer: Bigfoot 25 ft RQ
Missouri
Posts: 398
A guide for you for st patrick's day

I don't drink but this is kind of funny.

PS: this is another stolen joke

A GUIDE FOR YOU FOR ST PATRICK'S DAY


IRISH BEER TROUBLESHOOTING GUIDE




SYMPTOM


CAUSE


CORRECTIVE ACTION

Feet cold and wet

Glass Being held at incorrect angle.

Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling

Feet warm and wet

Improper Bladder Control

Stand next to nearest dog, complain about lack of house training

Beer unusually pale and tasteless

a. Glass empty.

b. You're holding a Coors Lite

Get someone to buy you another beer

Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights

You have fallen over backward.

Have yourself leashed to the bar

Mouth contains cigarette butts, back of head covered with ashes

You have fallen forward

See above

Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet

a. Mouth not open

b. Glass applied to wrong part of face

Retire to restroom, practice in front of mirror

Floor Blurred

You are looking through bottom of empty glass

Get someone to buy you another beer

Floor moving

You are being carried out

Find out if you are being taken to another bar

Room seems unusually dark

Bar has closed

Confirm home address with bartender. If staff is gone, grab a six-pack to go and hit the nearest fire escape door. Run .

Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures

Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations

Cover mouth, open window, stick head outside

Everyone looks up to you and smiles

You are dancing on the table

Fall on someone cushy-looking

Beer is crystal-clear (my fav)

It's water! Somebody is trying to sober you up

Punch him

People are standing around urinals, talking

You're NOT in the ladies' room

Do not use urinal! Excuse yourself, exit and try the next door down the hall. Try to get phone numbers before exiting (optional)

Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear

You have been in a fight

Apologize to everyone you see, just in case it was them

Don't recognize anyone, don't recognize the room you're in

You've wandered into the wrong party

See if they have free beer

Your bedroom is painted gray, has a concrete floor and an interesting steel door. Toilet may be conveniently located next to your bunk

a. You're in jail

b. You're in the navy

Sleep it off, you can always get out tomorrow. Don't talk to your new roommate, and under no circumstances sleep on your stomach

You are dancing to a Village People song, and your partner is wearing leather chaps

You're in a gay bar

Keeping your back to the wall, edge toward nearest exit. Do not accept offers for backrubs

Your singing sounds distorted

The beer is too weak

Have more beer until your voice improves

Don't remember the words to the song

Beer is just right

Play air guitar

__________________

__________________
Bruce H is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-18-2011, 08:14 AM   #2
Senior Member
 
Alf S.'s Avatar
 
Name: Alfred
Trailer: 2014 Escape 5.0TA / 2010 Nissan Frontier
Ontario
Posts: 3,816
Registry
Send a message via Yahoo to Alf S.
Hi: Bruce H... Remember this "An Irishman is never drunk, so long as he can hold on to one blade of grass and not fall off the face of the earth"!!!
Alf S North shore of Lake Erie :Wave
__________________

__________________
Alf S. is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2011, 05:32 PM   #3
Senior Member
 
Name: Dave
Trailer: 2000 Scamp 16 ft Side Dinette Deluxe / 2006 Toyota Tundra
Posts: 172
I am tired of Irish ethnic jokes, they make me so mad when I finish this drink I will go hit someone.
__________________
D Tharp is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
12 volt RV wiring guide Rick kl Problem Solving | Owners Helping Owners 8 08-09-2016 10:56 PM
CG Guide with Casita on cover! melissab General Chat 2 03-17-2011 11:02 AM
Remembrance Day/Veterans Day Chester Taje General Chat 7 11-12-2010 12:09 AM
Campground guide book whaleytp General Chat 7 02-07-2008 01:57 PM
Travel Guide George N Houston General Chat 2 02-07-2007 02:48 PM

» Upcoming Events
No events scheduled in
the next 465 days.
» Virginia Campgrounds

Reviews provided by


Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 11:47 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.