Here's a few more of life's little observations or vexing questions:
- If croutons are made from stale bread, why do they come in airtight packages?
- Why does sour cream has an expiration date?
- Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced “onety-one?”
- If a cow laughed, would milk come out its nose?
- Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?
- How come one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
- Ever think who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?" OR Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."
- Why is there a light
in the fridge
and not in the freezer?
- If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
- Why people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
- Why when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
- Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
- Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
- How a cemetery could raise its burial cost and blame it on the cost of living.
- About the 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
- That if you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone in a BMW would be stupid enough to try and pass them.
- That the things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first.
- Why a flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries. OR A Shin is a device for finding furniture in the dark.
- That the only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.
- That when you go into court you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people that weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
- That scientists say 1 out of every 4 people are crazy. Check 3 friends, if they are ok, you're it.
- If you’re going to test the depth of water, never do it with both feet.