Silly Stuff - Fiberglass RV


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Old 02-23-2007, 09:54 AM   #1
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*******************************************
A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the
house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, "Honey,
pack your bags. I won the lottery!"
The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain
stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get out."
**************************************************

**************************************************
A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license. First,
of course, he had to take an eye sight test.
The optician showed him a card with the letters
'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.' "Can you read this?" the optician asked.
"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."
**************************************************

**************************************************
Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, "I must
tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent.!"
"Thank God, said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm so tired of chardonnay."
**************************************************

**************************************************
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL!
Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD!
You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them!
TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are
we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK!
Careful . CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL!
You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them!
Hurry up! Are you CRAZY?
Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them.
You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt.
USE THE SALT! THE SALT!" The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong
with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied,
"I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."
**************************************************

**************************************************
Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North Carolina mountain man, was
drafted by the Army. On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him
a comb. That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair. On his
second day, the Army issued Herman a toothbrush. That afternoon the Army
dentist yanked seven of his teeth. On the third day, the Army issued him a
jock strap. The Army has been looking for Herman for 51 years.

**************************************************
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Old 02-23-2007, 09:59 PM   #2
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Cool

*snort*
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Old 02-24-2007, 01:15 AM   #3
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Joanie,
A pretty good collection!
Thanks...
Kurt & Ann KJ.
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Old 02-24-2007, 09:50 AM   #4
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Hi All

I had second thoughts about the jokes I posted in Silly Stuff.

When I first read them, I laughed but then thought maybe they were were a little too risque?
I mean, I was thinking, are those the kind of jokes a Christian should post?

Maybe not

So I will probably ask to have this thread pulled

Sorry
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Old 02-24-2007, 10:19 AM   #5
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I enjoyed them. Your scale for risque and mine are vastly different.
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Old 02-24-2007, 12:03 PM   #6
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I laughed but then thought maybe they were were a little too risque?

Maybe not
Two of them have been posted here previously...
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Old 02-24-2007, 08:47 PM   #7
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Among the other things I've done in life, I must admit to being a retired minister...20 years was enough. Anyway, I learned all about jock straps when I was about 11, so I'm hardly scandalized by a jock strap joke.

I was also in the military for a few years as well and recall seeing new recruits going through processing and getting their many shots with the new-fangled air guns instead of the old syringes. Standing in single file, they would pass by a medic on either side who would swab the upper arms with alcohol, then go to the next station for air gun shots in each arm. Following which, a happy medic standing outside the door would swab the recruit's neck, leading the recruit to imagine.... (Did they pull this gag in the Navy as well, Frederick?)

My favorite religious laugh comes from Mark Twain. When asked if he believed in infant baptism he replied, "Believe in it? Hell, I've seen it!" This one always makes me laugh!
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Old 02-24-2007, 09:04 PM   #8
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Standing in single file, they would pass by a medic on either side who would swab the upper arms with alcohol, then go to the next station for air gun shots in each arm.

Following which, a happy medic standing outside the door would swab the recruit's neck, leading the recruit to imagine.... (Did they pull this gag in the Navy as well, Frederick?)
I remember seeing the air guns... but I don't remember actually getting the shots...
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Old 02-24-2007, 10:29 PM   #9
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answered?.
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