Maintenance & Restoration

Jen'nBarb · 12-08-2006, 07:36 PM

To prove to the possum it could be done!

Alf S. · 12-08-2006, 09:01 PM

Quote:

To prove to the possum it could be done!

Hi: If at first you don't succeed try "Playing Possum"

Alf S. North shore of Lake Erie

debbyj · 12-08-2006, 09:59 PM

And the armadillo was taking notes...

Paddy Morris · 12-09-2006, 11:13 AM

Why did the elephant cross he road?

He was tied to he chicken!

Morgan · 12-09-2006, 12:02 PM

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Why did the elephant cross he road?

He was tied to he chicken!

I love elephant jokes.

Why do elephants paint their toe nails red?

debbyj · 12-09-2006, 01:24 PM

Okay, Morgan. I give up--why?

Morgan · 12-09-2006, 04:23 PM

Quote:

Okay, Morgan. I give up--why?

So they can hide in an apple tree.

Did you ever see an elephant in an apple tree?

Keith Williams · 12-10-2006, 09:00 AM

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So they can hide in an apple tree.

Did you ever see an elephant in an apple tree?

No, but I saw their footprints in my peanut butter jar the other day.

Morgan · 12-10-2006, 09:43 AM

Quote:

No, but I saw their footprints in my peanut butter jar the other day.

Their strategy works doesn't it?

james kent · 12-12-2006, 08:56 AM

So why did the elephant ware springs on it's feet?
So it could hide in the trees

What's the worst sound you can hear in the jungle?
Boing! Boing! Boing!

Christine D · 12-13-2006, 04:15 PM

Quote:

To prove to the possum it could be done!

Ha! In Montana it is the skunks who can't seem to get across the road....

Benita · 07-08-2007, 09:58 AM

Why DID The Chicken Cross The Road?

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on THIS side of the road before it goes after the problem on the OTHER SIDE of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his CURRENT problems before adding NEW problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

NANCY POLOSI: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain. Alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that inter-westing? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its wife long dweam of cwossing the woad.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra..#@&&^( C \ .Reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken!

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

Doug & Anna-Marie P · 07-08-2007, 05:35 PM

Oh what a giggle--nice way to send me off on my holidays--in my "egg" and watching out for chickens!!!!!!!

james kent · 07-08-2007, 09:02 PM

Plato: For the greater good

Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken did cross the road reveals your underlying insecurity.

Moses: And God came downfrom heaven, and he saidunto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." and the chicken didcross the road, and there was much rejoicing.

Budda: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.

Grandpa: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that he had and thad was good enough for us.

Capt. James T Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

Richard Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road, I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.