Setting up a new workshop? - Fiberglass RV

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Old 01-06-2008, 11:39 PM   #1
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Copied from another RV Forum:

Setting up a new workshop? There is a lengthy list of tools you'll
need. This list will help you get started:

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat
metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest
and flings your beer across the room, splattering it against that
freshly stained heirloom piece you were drying.

WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere
under the workbench at the speed of light.

ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their
holes until you die of old age.

SKIL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.

BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor
touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board
principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable
motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more
dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt
heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer
intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

WELDING GLOVES: Heavy duty leather gloves used to prolong the
conduction of intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various
flammable objects in your shop on fire.

WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and
motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16- or
1/2-inch socket you've lost.

TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood
projectiles for testing wall integrity.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground
after you have installed your new brake pads, trapping the jack handle
firmly under the bumper.

EIGHT-FOOT LONG YELLOW PINE 2x4: Used for levering an automobile
upward off of a trapped hydraulic jack handle.

TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters and wire wheel wires.

E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool ten times harder than any
known drill bit that snaps neatly off in bolt holes thereby ending any
possible future use.

RADIAL ARM SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most
shops to scare neophytes into choosing another line of work.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength
of everything you forgot to disconnect.

CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 24-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A very large pry bar that
inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end
opposite the handle.


TROUBLE LIGHT: The home mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called
a drop light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine
vitamin," which is not otherwise found under cars at night. Health
benefits aside, its main purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at
about the same rate that 105mm howitzer shells might be used during,
say, the first few hours of the Battle of the Bulge. More often dark
than light, its name is strangely appropriate.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under
lids and for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing
oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip
out Phillips screw heads.

STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to
convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws.

AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burning
power plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that
travels by hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty
bolts which were last over-tightened 30 years ago by someone at Ford,
and instantly rounds off their heads. Also used to quickly snap off
lug nuts.

PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or
bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to make hoses too short.

HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is
used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts
adjacent the object we are trying to hit -- or thumbs, whichever are

MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of
cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly
well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic
bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic
parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes and fingers, but
only while in use.

- Sandy (just some humor for RVers out there)

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Old 01-07-2008, 12:00 AM   #2
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Old 01-07-2008, 07:31 AM   #3
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Here's a couple more very usefull items

NAIL SET: Used to make small, round depressions around the head of a finish nail.

8- FOOT LONG 2X4: Used for levering an automobile upwards off a hydrolic jack handle.

PHONE: Tool used to call your neighbour to see if he has another hydrolic floor jack.

TABLE SAW: Used to make wood slightly narrower than necessary.

MITER SAW: used to make wood slighter shorter than necessary.

HAMMER{A}: originally employed as a weapon of war, is now used as a divining rod to locate the most expensive parts not far from the object we are trying to hit.

HAMMER{B}: Tool of choice for making medium sized circular depressions.

EXPLETIVE: A balm, usually applied verbally in hindsight, which somehow eases those pains and indignities following our every deficiency in foresight.
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Old 01-07-2008, 08:52 AM   #4
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ELECTRONIC STUDFINDER: Used to increase the possibilty of finding the closest possible point while still avoiding the stud.

CHEATER BAR: Three foot piece of pipe used to slip over the end of a ratchet so that when it shears off the bolt you can make sure all 8 knuckles are smashed equally.

COPING SAW: See Hacksaw above.
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Old 01-07-2008, 09:58 AM   #5
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.....well it 'appears' I then have all the tools I could ever need for/in my shop.

Trouble is NOW I need to get rid of about 3/4ths of them to accomodate a pending move to a townhouse when I retire in '08!

Wonder if anyone has compiled a similar list of tools not necessarily needed, LOL!!!!

These all seem soooo very important AND useful.
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Old 01-07-2008, 10:31 AM   #6
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A couple more --

PENCIL -- the thing you misplace every time you go in the workshop for which you spend more than half your workshop time in search thereof.

BANDAID -- see shop rags.
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Old 01-07-2008, 06:28 PM   #7
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Oh, Pete, we roared reading your list, plus addenda ... lots of "been there, done that" moments to be sure. Thanx, all! L 'n D
“Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions.” A. Einstein
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Old 01-09-2008, 12:05 AM   #8
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Workbench - A storage space for tools.

Pegboard - A perforated surface decorated with erratically arranged metal hooks.
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Old 01-09-2008, 01:44 AM   #9
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Vacuum cleaner: A machine used for sucking-in important small parts and hiding them in a bag full of dirty, unimportant stuff.

Safety goggles: Self-fogging devices that gradually reduce your vision until you remove them and end up with dirt in your eyes while all fingers and knuckles are covered with grease, making you temporarily blind.
Driving on parkways and parking in driveways.
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Old 01-09-2008, 06:50 AM   #10
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Hi: The most important definition I think is for "WORK SHOP".
A room that makes you stop and think of the "here after"... as in " What am I HERE AFTER"
Alf S. North shore of Lake Erie
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Old 01-09-2008, 08:07 PM   #11
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One of my friends sent me some videos (no URL, so I can't post it here) about power tool demos. A Google search should reveal them. They are about a leafblower, nailgun and powerdrill. A riot!

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