1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He
acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be
an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a
weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said, 'Keep off the Grass.'
14. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
15. It wasn't that the man didn't know how to juggle. He just didn't have the
balls to do it.