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Old 03-28-2009, 04:04 PM   #1
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A guy is driving around the back woods area of Luisiana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down Cajun cabin: "Talkin Dawg 4Sale".
He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the back yard.
The guy goes into the back yard and sees a nice looking beagle sitting there.
"You talk?" he asks
"Yup", says the beagle
After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing the dog talk, he says "So what's your story?"
The beagle looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA and they had me sworn into the toughest branch of the armed services....... the US Army Special Forces. You know the reputation of them Green Barets."
"In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders: because no one figursd a dog would be evesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running, but but the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger. SO, I decidedto settle down."
"I retired from the army [8 dog years is 56 Corps years] and signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover sucerity, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mass of puppies, and now I'm just retireed."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and askes the owner what he wants for the dog.
"Ten dollars", the guy says."
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's such a liar! He never did any of that stuff. He was in the Navy!"
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Old 05-04-2009, 12:15 PM   #2
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That is great. I have a similar one:

A small town all turns out at $5 a person to see the "Talking Dog."

The man asks the dog, "What is the texture of sandpaper?"

The dog says, "Rough."

The man asks the dog, "What is on top of a house?"

The dog says. "Roof."

That does it. The townsfolk grab the guy, take their money back, and deposit him and his dog at the town line.

Walking away together, the dog says, "Why were they so upset?"
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Old 05-04-2009, 12:21 PM   #3
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And another:

A man in the navy sends his mother a talking parrot from an exotic location.

When he comes home he asks his mother how the parrot is.

She said, "It was delicious!"

"What? You ate it? That bird could speak 5 languages!"

"Well, why didn't it say something?"
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