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Old 01-20-2006, 03:43 PM   #1
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Enclosed you will find my 2005 tax return showing that I owe $3,407.00 in taxes.
Please note the attached article from the USA Today newspaper, dated 12 November, wherein you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.
I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six (6) hammers valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my total remittance to $3,429.00.
Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the "Presidential Election Fund," as noted on my return.
You can do this inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5" Phillips Head screw (see aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailing how H.U.D. pays $22.00 each for 1.5" Phillips Head Screws).
One screw is enclosed for your convenience.
It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward to paying it again next year.

Sincerely, A Satisfied Taxpayer

This should get me a paid vacation!
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Old 01-20-2006, 04:29 PM   #2
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OK, Renee, you're on vacation effective today. Your forum salary will continue during your absence.
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Old 01-20-2006, 11:26 PM   #3
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HAR!!!! I like it!

Here is this years simplified form for singles. It was scaled down to simply one question, and one instruction.

The government knows how we are not bothered with all those silly deductions and credits and stuff.. cause, after all, we are single. What would we need those breaks for?

They have done us a BIG favor with this new form! Now instead of wasting endless hours filling out paperwork, we can focus more on our wild and crazy party lives and enjoy our total lack of obligation!

IRS tax form 1040ezpeazee, for single filers only:

1. How much did you make?

Send it in.
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