Sign

[Legacy Posts]

People should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm
stupid." That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You
wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me...
oops, never mind. I didn't see your sign."

It's like before my wife and I moved from Texas to
California, our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul
truck in our driveway. My friend comes over and says, "Hey, you
moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a
week. Just to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."

A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of
mine. We pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big
'ol stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey,
y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope. Talked 'em into giving up.
Here's your sign."

I was out in the front yard with my boy the other day
and he was playing with his little friend, and he hit his friend
and I went up to him and I said, "Hey, (smacked the boy on his
head), we don't hit." He looked up at me like, "Here's your
sign, dad."

I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery
Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. There's
only one way to test that. "All right, Jimmy, you got that shark
suit on, it looks good. They want you to jump into this pool of
sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you."
"Well, all right...hold my sign, I don't wanna lose it."

Last time I was home I was driving around and I had a flat
tire, so I pulled my truck into one of these side-of-the-road gas
stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me,
and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. I said,
"Nope. No, I was driving around and those other three just
swelled right up on me. Here's your sign."

We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy
came over to the house, drove the car around for about 45 minutes.
We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down
and grabs the exhaust pipe, then goes, "Darn, that's hot!"
See, if he'd been wearing his sign, I could've stopped him.

[Legacy Posts]

Well, did the guy buy the car or not?

And where's my sign?

[Legacy Posts]

Orginally posted by Charles Watts

Well, did the guy buy the car or not?

And where's my sign?

My last born (I hope) rode home with his Mom once and the brakes were squeaking a bit. When she pulled into the driveway, Neil promptly reached down and grabbed the front rotor.

If he had had his sign, she could have stopped him.

[Legacy Posts]

That's too darn funny! :laugh :laugh :laugh

*At least he won't have to worry about fingerprints!*

[Legacy Posts]

I learned to drive an 18 wheeler in my days of
adventure. Wouldn't ya know I misjudged the height of
a bridge. The truck got stuck and I couldn't get it
out no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help and
eventually a local cop shows up to take the report.
He went through his basic questioning. No problem. I
thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign...
until he says "So..is your truck stuck?" I couldn't
help myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig,
then back to him and said, "No I'm delivering a bridge
...Here's your sign!". :o

[Legacy Posts]

Years back I was working in a shop soldering some connections.
I had the soldering iron sitting on the edge of the bench - hot side facing out. One of the salesmen comes up and asks is that hot - as he picks up the iron by the pointy hot end. ( he didn't hold it very long- but long enough) I couldn't believe it!
I finally said, you tell me.

He needs a sign.....

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A few years back we phoned Little Caesars to order a pizza. The kid on the phone asked "Is this for pick up or delivery?" "Oh, you deliver?" I said. The voice on the other end says " No you have to pick it up". :o

This kid definitely needs a sign! :o

[Legacy Posts]

When I was about 5 years old (before we invented numbers, so I'm not sure), I was in a blacksmith shop with my dad. There was a neat tool laying on the bench and I backed up to it with larceny in my heart.

It was a soldering iron hot off the forge (this was before we invented electricity) so I dropped it like a hot potato. The nervous system has a long delay line in its "drop that " circuit so my hand was burned badly.

Cured that little larcenous adventure.

Had I had my sign, the smithy could have warned me

[Legacy Posts]

Wow - you must surely be older than George! :lol

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Last night I was catching up on the Casita Club Forum after a long trip and someone had written that they always leave their bed as a bed in the Casita and they store their table in the attic. I looked at my husband and queried, "Did you know that some Casitas have an ATTIC?" Send the sign, quick. Lorraine

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If I remember correctly, the Casita "attic" is included with the "half basement" option. :P
Bill H

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We are originally from England .Whilst eating in a restaurant in Oregon a sweet young waitress said "I love your accent" "Well thankyou said I"
Then she asked....... Do you speak American with an English accent or do we speak English with an American accent?
No! she did'nt need a sign it was a genuine question.......Was'nt it?:o

[Legacy Posts]

I was on a trip with a number of people who might have been related to me but I can't say for sure or I'll give away who the driver was. I'll leave it at the fact that the driver was pretty confident in his ability to outsmart anyone else in the vehicle.

We were driving through the Rockies in a GMC van pulling a 31 foot Airstream. ALL the way there the driver complained about the lack of pep in the van. "Just got this thing tuned" the driver griped. "I can't believe this, it just won't climb these hills at higher than 45 (MPH)!!!" "What," he thundered, "is wrong with this thing?" ":censor"

We even stopped for gas and potty breaks without discovering the problem.

After 300 MILES we got reached our destination and the female adult in the party said, "What is that burning smell?"

I am happy to report that the van's pep returned immediately after the emergency brake was released.

On that same trip the driver took many dramatic pictures of the red rock canyons and the children posing on the edges of cliffs. :wave :wave :wave :wave

Took about 63 pictures, it seems. Then someone asked why we were still on the same roll of film.

If there had been a sign, we would have some great pictures of that trip. :helpme Oops! Wrong sign.

[Legacy Posts]

Please send my sign ASAP.

My wife and I were going out to run some errands. Her truck (we have His and Her trucks) has a dashboard key-switch for the passenger-side airbag. You put the ignition key in it and select whether you want the airbag on or not. So, reverting to my youth I suppose, I slip the key into THAT dashboard switch and start turning it back and forth trying to start the truck. After a few tries I turn to her and say "I think your battery is dead!"

The look she gave me was priceless, not that I'd want to buy one like it.

I tried "Just joking, honey!" She didn't go for it.

On second thought, send the sign to her so SHE can give it to me. She'll enjoy that.

[Legacy Posts]

but someone I know has this great tow vehicle. Does just about everything except run on empty. Never wanted all those fancy doo-da's, they just came on it. Funny how all those little things quickly become a necessity.

Like those headlights that come on when you start the car. Okay, the vehicle had them, but who really needs them? She was pretty funny about that. Thought that was pretty bad when a person couldn't even flip a switch to turn the lights on and off. That is until one night she hooked up the trailer and was going out for a bit.

''What's the matter with those darned lights?''

''You got them on automatic?''

''Of course they're on autmatic. They're turned off. When they're turned off they're on autmatic. But they won't come on.''

After several starts and stops, getting madder by the minute, second party finally said:

''Don't worry about it. It's probably just something quirky.''

''This vehicle is less than two years old and I don't like quirky.''

Arriving home and after unhitching the trailer, the lights were still not doing what they were suppose to. Getting ready to pull into the garage, started car and still no lights came on. Oh, well, garage light was on, just wouldn't worry about it.

Released emergency brake to drive into garage and the lights came on.

Well, I'll be. Just something quirky. Guess it was trying to tell her, ''Hey, stupid, you can't go anywhere until you release that emergency brake so you don't need any lights!''

I think I (uh, she) needs a sign.